How to do Hard Things


(My personal process)

I am on a roll of doing hard things. I mean, the last few months, I have been hyperventilating, crying, cussing and smiling like a goon. Because I have training for an epic run, played an instrument on stage, sent out pitches to national magazines and reached out to my heroes for interviews for my podcast. Oh, and started a podcast.

It’s been scary, but so worth it. The funny part for me is the scary parts are so small, like asking for help, or the fear of looking like an idiot. It’s not the fear of dying or anything life-threatening. So, while I am on this wave of fun, I thought that I would jot down some advice while I am all high and mighty…just kidding, I am still a scared little bunny.  

Why do things that are hard? I mean, really? Why? Well, for one thing, it gets results. Good or bad, it definitely moves the needle over from the endless loop that life can sometimes fall into. So, if you are tired of going around and around, you might need to do a hard thing to jump the rut and start another song. 
*Also, I have found if I don’t do something hard, life will throw me something rough, and I’d much rather pick my own medicine. 
What: This is the part where I can get stuck. Identifying the thing that keeps tripping me up, and that I cannot seem to achieve. It doesn’t have to be climbing mountains or running a marathon. It can be something simple like standing up for myself, asking for forgiveness, having a hard conversation, getting support, or start to thinking differently. It’s something that I don’t normally do, and can be very simple. 
When: My test is when I should start dipping my feet in the pool of discomfort is when my vices take over and want to continually comfort myself. I’ll eat too much, run too much, do all the things too much. It’s then when I pause and realize that I need to face something that’s brewing and get over myself and jump. 

But how?
1. Look Up. “When setting out on a journey, do not seek advice from those who have never left home”- Rumi.
I have 4-5 people I look to who are always doing hard things and now the drill. I go to them to freak out, cry and hold me accountable. If you go to people aren’t challenging themselves, they won’t be helpful when things get tough. 
2. Keep a journal. Writing things down when things get rocky is super helpful to see patterns, truths, and mental blocks. (Also, for me, keeping a journal was a HUGE hard thing I did)
3. Self-talk (mantra). Find a phrase that will help balance out the negative chatter in your head. Mine is “You’ll be fine.”  
4. Always Ask. What’s the worst that can happen? I always go back to this question when my heart starts racing, and I start to spiral. ‘Will I fail? Get laughed at? Die? Will people not like me anymore?’
I usually question each one and keep going forward, unless death is an option. Or caves, I hate caves.

If you want to ask me a question or want to write down something scary you want to do, I invite you to e-mail me here.

Go forth!